Inspiration By Death

The girl in Venezuela.
She was there
in the fading days of my precious innocense.
She was nice,
with pretty eyes and pretty smiles,
Giving pretty dresses and pretty bracelets.
Quite photogenic at the least,
I still have most of them.

But she’s gone now,
Wasted with the rest of them.
They all needed help,
in similar ways.
Ultimately all were because of you.

You’ve plundered through the ones I’ve held dear
and I absolutely hate you for it,
with all of my heart.
That may seem a bit contradicting,
but its okay
because it works.

You’ve entered the bodies
of the strong and innocent,
And you’ve left them weak and confused.

You took over the one I was supposed to trust
and you stayed for far too long,
You replaced me.
She hates me now,
and its all your fault.

And the boy in Caracas,
he was my best friend.
He fucking died
trying to get to you!!!
He was shot in the head
on May 10, 2003
And a part of me died
right along with him.

Then you went and invaded
the one I was supposed to comfort,
the one I felt responsible for.
All it took was two weeks without me
and you sent her spiraling,
out of helpless control.
She simply could not stop herself,
even though I know she wanted to.
She just didn’t care anymore,
because although I was holding her,
she was holding you,
And nothing else mattered.

Then there was the man with all the stories.
You seduced him with your scent,
so he inhaled the sickening fumes
right out of your intoxicating hands.
Now I stand in his presence,
but he does not see me,
you blacken his already blurred vision.

But this is all I’ve ever known of him,
was you intertwined.
So somehow I still have hope
that I will be able to trust him someday,
Even though he scares me sometimes
and I know that I shouldn’t.
So from my point of disheartening view,
you’ve kidnapped him,
And you hold him unconscious in front of my face,
just barely out of my reach.

But then you stole the girl in Venezuela,
Because she was clinging onto you,
tighter than she was her own pathetic
wonderful life.

And I really cannot completely understand it,
but I am thankful for you as well.
If you hadn’t given me a reason to hate you,
well I'm the type that just might love you.
So I suppose these losses were necessary.
But I still hate you.

Responses

1 comment so far.

1. Kelly Hernandez says:

   Wow, that was a pretty blunt message right there. I liked it though.. I can relate, not so literally but I do..