So this is what happend...

my friends changed today
I'm not sure why
it doesn't help to point fingers
which is why i cry
they've all pointed to me
and i took all the blame
so now they think that i'll recover form all the tears and shame
she says i have no idea
of how much i hurt her
but i still fall back and take the blame my good sir
i tell her I'm sorry and i just blew up
but that was just stupid of me much too abrupt
but i was heart broken and ripped to sheds
you say you care but were you there?
do you know all of my dreads?
i cried in the bathroom
and you came in like you cared
asked me what was wrong
but was quiet and scared
i never point the finger
what good could come of that
just another female squabble
just another drama act
so i sit quiet as you point the finger at me
and with all the love in my heart
all i do is try to see.

maybe i did do this i say
maybe this is my fault.
but blaming me for this whole situation is a simple insault
so tell me what i did wrong
i've hurd it so many times
but know i shall tel YOu
threw these words and these rhyms

you hurt me deep down inside
but did you see
no...
i never thought you were worthless and never wanted to let you go
but the way you changed it broke my heart
and it certainly was not for the best
you say you love me but how could you?
you treat me like a pest
so heres what happened if you don't know
this is how it went
you drifted away
away form me and less and less time was spent
instead of speech you assumed and said i didn't care
so who's left hurt?
who left sad?
who's the victim there?
it's you of course it always is just see things threw my eyes
you never spoke just drifted more
and broke all our ties
then threw me all the blame
and that day i cried
that day felt
every ounce of shame
you and her
both together
told me what was wrong
she stormed out
what was that all about?
did she think it was being strong?
sick and tired of two people talking about me behind me back
so i start to build and start to be filled with anger i usually lack
you pushed me to that edge that dangerous edge that people lose themselves too.

but losing myself is not something i will ever willingly easily do.

but do you know what really got me what really pushed me far?

i only had 1
one friend who i still trusted
and you stuck to him like tar

you say he's your friend and i should trust you
but how can i with the way you act.
when i was with him again, you started to flirt with him more and that was a fact.

it was no matter of jelousy this i swear because if it was i would say

but i had no friends
i sat alone
and watched you flirt with him all day

this STILL would not have bothered me but listen to this
theres somthing that you happend to miss
you say it's a lie but your not in my shoes
so my dear friend heres where you lose

you excluded me
and included jake
how much is friend suppost to take ?
i fight and try to be fair and clear but what was i suposed to do
just sit quiet and near!
I COUDN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE AND YOU BROKE MY HEART
IT'S LIKE YOU WANTED ME UNHAPPY FROME THE VERY START!
I TRIED SO HARD TO BE NICE AND SUPPORT EVERYTHING YOU DO
BUT HERES THE BOTTOM LINE
WHERE I STOP TO FACE THE TRUTH...

i wanted nothing more than for us all to be friends
but we couldn't just end it all and come to our mends?
behind my back you bubbled and bubbled way out of control
so i released my word to this
and finally cleansed my soul.
and i end this with tears in my eyes
because i know for once I'm not wrong
just
surrounded by lies
you may be heated and ready to blow
but please of please don't come to me though
cause after all this smoke and flack

I'm putting this all behind my back.

Responses

1 comment so far.

1. sam says:

   Oh my, Raechale I'm so sorry.
   I wish none of that had happend
   and I wish you were still here at our school
   Also, I want to make things better no matter how far away you are. I love you til death. We may have a few conflicts in between but we will resolve them one way or another. You should have come to me, and I didn't realize at the time how cruel I was actually being. I'm oh so sorry. Please forgive me. I don't blame you for not coming out and talking to us about it. We were trying to pin it on you and no matter how much we did that, you stayed strong to what you believed. and I love you for that. I'M SORRY HUN!!! I love you<3!